I wanted to have the perfect valentine’s day and clean the house and make dessert. Nate was going to make the steak because if he wants steak, then he knows he’s the only one that can make it. That is not how things turned out.
Shopping for Valentine’s Day amazing chocolaty heart shaped type dessert recipes costs a ridiculous amount of money. Just with the cream cheese I was at $8. After seeing how much this dessert was going to cost I gave up and got a frozen tiramisu at Target for $4.99.
That was in the morning, when I thought I was going to have a productive Thursday and the electricity went out until noon so I ended up at Target. A lot of other things happened besides being unable to use my computer for half the day that ended with me having a mini panic attack about the fact that I did not get any work done (in my design business or with the house), worrying about money and our hopes to get out of debt, and in the end of ruining a lot of things (I thought ruined my phone because it had these gears that just spun for hours and when I tried to power it down it just came back up again with the gear spinning thing, I thought I ruined my new hair AGAIN, the house looked horrible), I just curled up in bed feeling like I should give up on life, hoping my phone would come back to life, hoping my hair would recover and thinking that everyone at Patti’s must be sick of me, and thinking Nate would come home, take one look at the state of things, and just go to bed like I had. And really hoping the next day would be better and I would get more done and I would feel like I actually owned a business again and was making money. (When things are good with the business, I feel good. When I have a day when I can’t make things happen, I get very depressed and in this case, almost sick to my stomach).
The following is part of our messaging conversation which I had on my tablet which is recorded in my phone.
Things got better after that. Nate cleaned the kitchen and I got ready and we went out for Valentine’s Day. It was past 9:00 pm so we went to a diner. A lady complimented my hair which made me happy. Nate got me the sweetest card ever.